In The News
The Bureaucratic Confusion
“A leaked government memo reveals that a routine trade summit accidentally dissolved international treaties and merged two nations because an intern misspelled an automated calendar invite. Bureaucrats have reportedly decided to run with the mistake rather than fill out the correction forms in triplicate.”
The Logistics Nightmare
“Government officials have unveiled blueprints for a 3,000-mile sky-bridge bypass connecting Toronto directly to Tijuana. When asked how they plan to bypass the laws of physics, a spokesperson responded: ‘We don’t have time for geographic technicalities. Just fix it.’ Read the shocking engineering meltdown inside.”
The Public Reaction
“A historic new poll shows an overwhelming 84% of voters fully support the immediate creation of the ‘Canadexico’ super-territory—despite having absolutely no idea where it is on a map. ‘At this point, absolute absurdity is better than reading another policy memo,’ said one local voter.”
VOTE CANADEXICO Because the border debates are exhausting, geography is hard, and honestly... who cares anymore? Just fix it.
Our Radical Geopolitical Manifesto
“At Canadexico, we believe the solution to polarization is absolute absurdity. When the nightly news starts sounding like bad fiction, we figure it’s time to redraw the maps entirely. Canadexico is a non-serious, entirely satirical exploration of modern political burnout. We don’t have the answers to policy crises, but we do have high-quality, direct-to-garment printed apparel. We are the official merchandise of the exhausted majority. Don’t take us seriously—the elites certainly don’t.”